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August 31, 2011



I don't feel like I can say anything to you because I haven't walked this road. But you have made me think about complaining- very seriously. Thank you for being willing to share.


Oh, Kate. You know how much I adore you? Tons. I admire your humor during this process and will definitely think twice before complaining in the future. Hugs, my shoe-loving birthday twin!


Thanks so much for the post, Kate, and for hosting this guest post, Angela. At first I felt that reading this two days into my first miscarriage might be a terribly bad idea, as I'm trying by best to stay positive at the moment. But I kept going, and the last paragraph was a great help and a great reminder. Many thanks and best wishes to you both.


Thank you so much for sharing your story, Kate. We wanted to start trying in April, but then...I had an 80-day cycle. At that point, we discovered I am insulin resistant, which affects your periods. i was put on medicine to fix that (in June), but so far... well, it's day 45 of my cycle..... & I'm like, 'HELLO, Aunt Flo?!??!" Haha. It seems like once that is straightened out, i SHOULD be able to get pregnant, but who knows? It can be so frustrating at times, because here it is nearly September & i haven't even been able to actually start TRYING yet (since i'm not ovulating, though we certainly haven't been preventing!). You are so right about how you always think it'll be so easy to have a baby when the time comes! And also about things people say... for me, it's "so when are you going to have a baby?" While this was an easy question to answer when we first got married, now it's kind of awkward since we're trying! What do they want me to say? "we're working on it"??? Sometimes more info than i'd like to share with acquaintances!

ANYWAY... I know my story is different, and that i'm just at the beginning of it, really. But i sincerely appreciate your sharing your story. And i love your humor. Praying you are pregnant soon & that you carry it to term & birth a beautiful healthy baby! {HUGS!}


Brooke I am so sad and so sorry to hear that. I'm sure most of that post was hard to read but I'm glad that there was something helpful for you. Lots of happy thoughts and prayers headed your way during this hard time.


Kate, I love your honesty and your attitude. And even though our situations are different, I'd be more than happy to help you punch those complaining pregnant women in the face!


Melissa, you totally should tell people that you're trying! And then ask if they can give you a minute. It should stop the questions :-)


Kate, I'm so sorry about your miscarriages. That has to be the hardest thing, particularly your third one. I can't even imagine. You have such a positive attitude though, and that will carry you through!


Wow. Thank you for being so honest. I had always been the "complainer" then my really good friend carried her son to term then lost him to stillbirth. It was the most horrible thing I have ever heard in my life. My sadness and tears for her could in now way compare to what she and her husband were feeling. I decided that I could no longer complain because I am SO blessed with my sweet daughter. I cringe when others complain about morning sickness, back aches, whiny kids, etc... at least they have one. I'm sorry about your trials with infertility and I hope with all my heart that you will soon carry to term and deliver a beautiful and healthy baby!


Being Mormon and married for five years before we officially started "trying" we got that question ALL THE TIME. I finally just responded with "I think you have to have sex to have a baby?" Shut them right up.

And no matter what the reason, not being able to have a baby when you want it sucks. Hope things get all regulated for you really soon so you can get that baby!!


That was really brave of you to share about your miscarriages. Thank you for sharing! You're in my thoughts!

Old Warrior

Hi, Kate. Angels"s Dad here - hate to intrude ion the chick-only theme but you have an amazing story of personal trauma and told it beautifully. Hope it was a bit cathartic to share with us. I went through "the tests" in the early 70's and my part of the testing was nothing compared to the relationship strain and emotional stress on our marriage.

Now, on to the weird potential stalker aspect of my comment.

About three years ago I opened a hosting account on not "stop mommy" and it really got screwed up. I still well recall that I finally got passed to a wonderful lady named "Kate" who was finally able to cut through the gordian knot and get everything back on track. I'm assuming that everyone there must be terrific even if that was not you.

Now back to stalking - great post!


My diagnosis was old eggs after one round of IVF. That was 14 years ago. I have one person in my life that complains a lot about her kids and it drives me crazy. I even say to her face that I will take them. She backs down a little but is a slow learner and is back at it in no time.


Kate... you seem like such an amazing lady. No wonder my sister loves you so much! Thank you for sharing this... it has certainly put some perspective into my day.

(p.s. What is it about music/theatre people that those large domain registrars love so much? A good deal of my music/theatre friends work for groupon or google... not saying that EITHER of those are what you were referring to... And I'd be lying if I said I haven't considered applying...)

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