Medical Revelations

It was an interesting week of doctor's appointments.  As further proof that I'm literally falling to pieces in my old age, I went from not having been to a doctor's office in almost three years, to three visits in one month.

My first appointment last week was to deal with the mild form of leprosy that has been spreading over my body for the past couple of weeks.  Much like the Wizard of Oz, the doctor asked all kinds of questions through his medical assistant before he even saw me, and by the time he came in, he'd already determined that I was afflicted with some form of poison ivy.  So, well done blog friends!  I now bestow upon you honorary doctorates in poison ivy detection.  I still don't know exactly when I touched poison ivy, but I'm now terrified to go out in the garden wearing anything less than a HAZMAT suit.

I've tapered down from a high dose of prednisone last week, to just one tablet per day today and tomorrow, plus Claritin to fight the allergy.  I'm still the slightest bit itchy, but a miraculous amount of healing has taken place in the last four days.  I can now wear short sleeve shirts without scaring small children, and while my legs are healing more slowly, I think I'll be back in skirts and shorts by the end of this week.

Unfortunately, I had to follow up that appointment with another visit to the doctor to have my lady business explored.  Now, I've never had anything out of the ordinary happen at one of these oh so joyous appointments, but I suspected something might be amiss as the doctor spent more than double the time and effort on my exam than any other doctor has in the past.  He was quick to assure me that I shouldn't read anything into this, and that this is just a precautionary check, but he scheduled me for an ultrasound next month.  Apparently my uterus hasn't had its V-8 today and seems to be tilted further forward than it should be.

I've been hesitant to spend too much time with Doctor Google after the disaster of diagnosing my last itchy malady, but honestly, how could I not do at least a couple of searches.  I'm glad I did, as in a strange turn of events, the internet actually made me feel better rather than worse about the situation.  Tipsy uteruses (uteri?  uterii??) seem to be a fairly common situation, and from the testimony of many poorly spelled message board missives, don't seem to really affect fertility.

Of course, I've always had this massive premonition that I'll have a difficult time getting pregnant when the time comes, so I can't help but feel a little bit like this is just more proof in that direction.  But I'm trying really hard not to work myself up over it.  I'll have the ultrasound done on May 3rd, head to New York for a week the next day, then come back home and talk it over with my doctor.

The thing I'm most worried about right now is how I'll possibly drink that much water and not be able to go to the bathroom for two hours before the exam.  Maybe it's time to invest in some Depends and rubber pants.

Comments

[Brittany]

wow, poison ivy can do that? That is intense! But I'm glad it all got figured out. And I bet your uterus is just tilted because it doesn't want to get pregnant right NOW. When the time comes it'll be like "oh, ok, cool!" and get back in shape. ;)

[Kendra]

Welcome to the world of tilted uteri, cuz! It's it exciting? Haven't had any complications with it...

[Jass]

I'm so glad it wasn't the invasion of tiny critters in your mattress. But I'm sorry to hear it was ivy poison. I have heard horror stories about them, and wouldn't even know what to look for when in a garden/park. Yikes, glad you will survive!

I have no clue about tipped uteri's, but I hope everything works out and fertility is not an issue. You are so much like me, it's scary hehe, I too think that when the time comes I will have difficulty, not sure why.

[The Incubator]

Isn't it nice to know that you and your sister popped right out of the cutest little tipped "u"? I think that back in the dark ages before you were born, the doc just said, "hum, lookee there!" Now, for fear of multiple law suits or because they have such wonderful toys to play with and fun tests to order they say, "let's order up this fun test so we can take pictures of your insides to prove that you are indeed tipsy!" Go figure -

[Cat]

Dude. I rock at diagnoses! Go me. Also, I have a tipped uterus, was sure I was going to have trouble conceiving should I ever decide that was something I wanted to do, and WHOOPS got preggo accidentally. No fertility issues here, apparently.

[Jessica]

Wow you have been busy at the doc's offices. don't stress about the lady area. It's better to be safe than sorry, and yay for ultrasounds! Let's hope it's not...an internal one.

[Jenn]

Wow, they could tell I have a tipsy uterus just by the way my cervix is, no tests required (that was probably more information about my lady bits than the internet needed, but there you go.)

My dad and my FIL are both super allergic to poison ivy, both of them can get it from SMOKE if it's being burned nearby. My husband? He can roll in the stuff and nothing will happen. I spend the entire time I'm in the woods saying "is that poison ivy? how about that? that?"

[shelley]

I think alot of women think they will have fertility issues...not sure why, maybe it's because their birth control actually worked lo those many years:) Anyway, this should be some sort of encouragement: Before Gunner, I was told I'd have a hard time getting pregnant...poly cystic ovaries, borderline endometriosis, non regular cycles...etc. My dr. even encouraged me to go ahead and get on fertility meds., as he didn't want me to get discouraged and be opting for adoption within 2 years, weird I know! Long story short...I was pregnant less than 2 months after that appt.! And, we were NOT trying!!! Moral of the story, you and your tilted uterus will be fine. Your mom and Kendra are proof:)

[Kristen at Miss Prissy Paige]

I'm with you on the Dr. Google thing. I think the I need to block Webmd from my browser as its caused a few more gray hairs to sprout. Hopefully its nothing serious, but I'll be thinking about you. xoxo