A Distraction of Microscopic Proportions

Today was meant to be  a day all about the joy of shoes, as we compared and contrasted the relative merits and drawbacks of my New York shoe contestants.  Instead, I am sitting downstairs in a nearly empty room, while a man cleans all of our carpets, and am awaiting a delivery from Amazon of mattress, box spring, and pillow covers.

It appears we have been infested.

With what, I do not know.

A couple of weeks ago, I received what I thought was a red ant bite on my leg.  It itched, and I grumbled about it, and waited for it to go away.  A couple of days later, I got a few more bites all in a row on my left arm, and I noticed that the "red ant" bite appeared a little less red antish than it had previously.  I continued to itch and grumble, as the bites mounted up.  We decided it was probably biting gnats as I'd been spending a lot of time outside in the evenings working in the garden.  But then, as I spent less time outside and the bites continued to increase in number, that seemed to be a less and less likely option.

There was still a lot of itching and grumbling going on.

Ever since I saw a 20/20 or Dateline or Nightline or somesuch special on bed bugs, I've been absolutely paranoid about Colby bringing bugs home from one of his trips.  He frequently makes fun of me as before I get in bed, I'll fling the covers back suddenly, in hopes of catching one of the blood suckers scuttling around beneath the sheets.  So, of course, the more I thought about it and the more time I spent with Dr. Google, the more I was convinced that our house was crawling with tiny bugs.  Colby raised the valid question as to why he wasn't being bitten, and even more valid, why after intensive searching we still hadn't found a speck of physical evidence of a bed bug infestation, but I was itchy, grumpy, and still intensely grumbly, so I stripped our bedroom of anything fabric and ran it through the sanitize cycle in the washing machine.  I also ordered the aforementioned mattress covers, and set to applying cortisone cream liberally.

At last count, I have somewhere in the neighborhood of fifty to sixty bites covering my arms and legs, and one particularly cheeky bite inside my belly button.  Colby has... zero.

Last night we slept on a bare mattress with just a sheet that is to be thrown into the washing machine shortly, and I wore a long sleeve shirt, pants and socks to bed.  And I still woke up this morning with more bites--or "bites" I don't even know at this point.

Currently Dr. Google has me convinced that I've managed to somehow contract scabies, perhaps as a throwback to my former life as a fearful pirate sailing the seven seas.  I already have a doctor's appointment set up for Thursday, so I'm going to ask if they can check out what is rapidly becoming a rash covering my appendages so I don't have to make another appointment and wait even longer to find out what is wrong with me.

Sooooo, the point of all this is that in my intense panic and grossed outedness, ordering shoes fell by the wayside.  But no parasitic mite should be able to take away that one last joy--you may feed off of my blood and ravage my skin, but you shall not take my shoes!

Comments

[Cat]

Any chance it could be poison ivy? Last time I touched it, it looked like bites at first, and eventually grew into a rash that covered my whole body. My doctor swears it cannot get into your blood stream, but seriously I had bumps in places I KNOW no plant got near.

[Heidi Renée]

Oh my god, seriously. When Jason goes on the boat he comes back disgusting, and he's a very clean guy!

Just last night I picked up a fallen twig from the flowering tree in our yard and brought it inside to put in a vase. I set it on the kitchen table for a moment while I got the vase out, and when I came back there were tiny little bugs that looked like pencil eraser shreds crawling all over the table. It was all I could do to pick it up and fling it back out the door. I scrubbed down the table, put my clothes in the wash, and showered immediately afterward.

I think I would be sleeping in a hazmat suit if they came anywhere near our room.

[Julia]

I got scabies via a disgusting mattress in a shady Barcelona hostel I stayed during one summer abroad. I was, of course, on the tail end of my trip and it didn't get really horribly disgusting until I was on the plane from Paris to Philadelphia, itching like mad. My parents met me in Philly for our connecting flight to Seattle and it was the worst trip EVER.

The gross thing is that the bugs don't live in your sheets...they are alive in your skin. My doctor gave me some cream that I was supposed to put on all over my body before I went to bed and then it killed it off. Then wash everything I had touched the next morning. Thankfully, 12 hours after, I was clean and not itchy. But...ugh. It sucks, so you have my sympathies!

(And of course this is always the story I tell to people who ask if it's worth staying in a hostel!)

[The Incubator]

I was wondering along the same vein as Cat - could it be poinson ivy? There are a host of people in our family who are allergic to this wonderful plant, including the Old Warrior. And the wonderful thing about this allergy is that you don't really even have to come in contact with it. Aunt Mary had it this weekend, and she had not even ventured out into the garden yet! Look that one up on Mr. Google and see what you get, my little one. On the bright side, my aching old lady feet acquired 2 pair of shoes today for our nyc adventure:)

[Kate]

It totally could be poison ivy -- I am one of the lucky ones who can get it just by being downwind of a plant.

I'm also SUPER paranoid about bedbugs and have crazy allergen/bedbug proof mattress covers on both beds in our house. I assume they work, since we've never had bedbugs...but maybe we've just never had bedbugs.

[Old Warrior]

I am HIGHLY allergic to Poison Ivy. It can spread through your system and it did in mine when I was at LSU. I had to get Cortisone injections to stop the systemic spread. The tip off that it is PI is the little "bites" develop a small pustule type head - in addition to itching like crazy. The heads contain the allergen so scratching it can cause it to spread via finger nails/tips. Then again, maybe it's just bed bugs.

[Jessica]

Oh my god! I can't believe it. I was bitten by bedbugs this summer and I sprayed down my bed and got a cover. It wasn't too pricey either. Awful. I got some kind of lotion from the pharmacy to help with the itching because it made me crazy. I can't believe Colby hasn't been bitten.

[Carolyn Rawson]

My mom experienced the same thing recently at their house in Ridgway, CO. She believes it is bed bugs. And it's similar in that she gets covered in bugs bites but my Dad doesn't get bitten AT ALL. I will have to ask her what she did but I think she got a new mattress as well. What a bummer! Hope it goes away now.

[Kate P]

Whoa! Sorry you had to go through that. Just thinking about those lovely shoes should be kinda soothing. . .

[A Super Girl]

You poor thing. Hope you figure out what it is quick!